Chapter4: The meaning of life ?

The Continuum Concept.
a brief introduction

This book has helped me enormously in trying to find out about myself and why I am the way I am. Why I was constantly chasing a feeling of contentment. According to the author Jean Liedloff It is all because of what didn’t happen in the first few years of life and so this book is also a must-read if and when you have children (even if you then choose to ignore it!)

The Continuum Concept was written and first published in 1975. It was written purely as an observation following Liedloff’s various stays with a tribe of South American Indians (Yequana). These Indians were almost totally untouched by the modern world and were living effectively a stone age existence.

What Jean observed was that almost all the inhabitants were at peace with themselves and that the children of the tribe were constantly contented and happy (unlike many western kids!).

Her conclusion was that in modern society we have moved so far away from what we, as humans, evolved to be, that we will never find contentment, however much we search through being workaholics, taking drugs, wanting celebrity, being a slob, having many lovers, spirituality, shopping (consumerism) etc.

The main reason for this is that most of us have missed the all-important first few years living in the arms of our parents with 100% unconditional love. This ‘in arms’ experience is what Liedloff claims we are crying out for as soon as we are born and that what for thousands of years we had.
According to Liedloff, the continuum concept is the idea that in order to achieve optimal physical, mental and emotional development, human beings — especially babies — require the kind of experience to which our species adapted during the long process of our evolution. For an infant, these include such experiences as constant physical contact with the mother (or another familiar caregiver), from birth Sleeping in the parents bed, in constant physical contact, until they leaves of their own volition (often about two years), breastfeeding "on cue", nursing in response to their own body's signals, being constantly carried in arms or otherwise in contact with someone, usually the mother and allowed to observe (or nurse, or sleep) while the person carrying them goes about his or her business — until the infant begins creeping, then crawling on their own impulse, usually at six to eight months.

In contrast, a baby subjected to modern Western childbirth and child-care practices often experiences traumatic separation from the mother at birth due to medical intervention and placement in maternity wards, in physical isolation except for the sound of other crying newborns, with the majority of male babies further traumatized by medically unnecessary circumcision surgery. At home, sleeping alone and isolated, often after "crying themself to sleep", scheduled feeding, with their natural nursing impulses often ignored or "pacified",
being excluded and separated from normal adult activities, relegated for hours on end to a nursery, crib or playpen where they are inadequately simulated by toys and other inanimate objects, caregivers often ignoring, discouraging, belittling or even punishing them when they cry or otherwise signals their needs, or else responding with excessive concern and anxiety, making them the center of attention, sensing (and conforming to) their caregivers' expectations that they are incapable of self-preservation, are innately antisocial, and cannot learn correct behaviour without strict controls, threats and a variety of manipulative "parenting techniques" that undermine the exquisitely evolved learning process.

Evolution has not prepared the human infant for this kind of experience. He cannot comprehend why his desperate cries for the fulfilment of his innate expectations go unanswered, and he develops a sense of wrongness and shame about himself and his desires. If, however, his continuum expectations are fulfilled — precisely at first, with more variation possible as he matures — he will exhibit a natural state of self-assuredness, well-being and joy. Infants whose continuum needs are fulfilled during the early, in-arms phase grow up to have greater self-esteem and become more independent than those whose cries go unanswered for fear of "spoiling" them or making them too dependent.

Liedloff is not saying we can now turn back the clock but it is a good observation and she has some suggestions as to how we can change some of these things for the better.

It has helped me because I know this is what I have been chasing for years and I can see it in the actions of others. It has helped me realise that there’s no point doing it anymore and I am happy to accept myself the way I am. It also helped me confirm my belief in evolution and not chase any spiritual / religious fulfilment.

The first few chapters can be a tough read but it is well worth sticking with as it becomes more practical.

Let me know what you think?

Chris

Ps – its got a really crap cover – try and not let that put you off!